The Day of the Mahogany Daughter

The average person would send a THANK YOU card that says:

Thank you for attending my birthday festivities.
Your presence was greatly appreciated.

Sincerely,
Andrea

Of course, my name is DREA, and I couldn’t just do that. It's not how I'm WIRED! For those for whom the above sentiment suffices, there is no need to read any further.


For the rest of you:

Picture this…
Drea's House, December 2008

It is Saturday morning... Drea is sitting on the couch in a bit of a daze. As she glances around her living room, everything seems pretty normal… the Christmas Tree, Gene’s HD television, a coffee table, the artificial tree by the steps and other insignificant objects that assure her that she is indeed at home in her usual surroundings. As her ‘eye tops’ become heavy from the exhaustion she worked up the night before, a picture flashes through her mind. They come briefly at first, like snapshots and then full scenes begin to roll out in her mind. It is as if she is half sleep/half awake. (Kinda like when they began her endoscopy before the anesthesia had taken effect.) She is very much ‘in the moment’, even though it’s not apparent to anyone else.

Had all of this really happened?

She sees familiar faces that seem so real that she could reach out and touch each one. In her ears, she hears the smooth, raspy voice of the poet, ‘JO-SEEPH!’, as he spits lyrics about LA FAMILIA, the virtues of the mahogany woman as BLACK DIAMONDS and shares his admiration for his CA-DIL-LAC! (There are a lot of mocha sisters in the room, but she swears that he must be talking directly to her!) She observes the 'ExtraTerrestrial' Puerto Rican Percussionist, Edwin, on the congas. He is out of this world! The Latin minstrel, JC, serenades her on his guitar with his song, Love Within, that he dedicated to her, and the sound he creates with six strings mesmerize her.

Reliving those moments in her mind, she turns to gather a panoramic view of the room. Her thoughts bounce from one memory to another:

AAAAHHHHHH!!!!! I CAN NOT BELIEVE THAT GENE DID THIS FOR ME!!! OH, MY GOODNESS!!!! Joseph Dominic and JC are in my living room! I LOVE THESE GUYS! Oh my! This is for real! THIS IS SO COOL! THIS IS JUST FOR ME! I think these guys just moved up into MY FAVE FIVE of musical artists! AAAAHHHH!!!! ~ Look at my FANTABULOUS sister standing over there by the camera. I’m so glad she is here... and that she didn’t get lost and miss the party this year, too! ~ GIJoeBro?! He came! Dang, he makes me so angry sometimes… but I love him and I’m so glad he’s here… I won’t let him know that tonight though… ol’ busta... ~ HA HA HA!!! Bill Cosby? You gotta be kidding me! I always knew my big brother was a nut! After twenty years of marriage, my sister knows he’s crazy, too, that’s prolly why she is just staying behind the camera helping us make memories. ~ Look at my sister… I can’t believe that all of her men came! Very cool! Pregnant and all, ‘she still got it’! She has such a beautiful voice. Yeah, she’s right I am SPECIAL, but I’m CRAZY, too. ~ This Chick is a NUT! She really came! I thought for sure that office party would keep her from making it. It’s after 10:30… I know it’s about to be hoppin’ in here now! ~ I can not believe the sounds that I am hearing coming from the left of me. God, You really DO love me. I feel like I am in Your throne room… It’s been a while since I have had an opportunity to enter into worship with people who value Your presence the way I do. They have MADE my entire year. ~ Man, it’s good to see her out and about with the baby. She and my brother brought HARMONY into the house in more ways than one, as my nephew used his voice to stir the presence of God around our home. I am so proud of him, but I see his dad is prouder. ~ Listen to the angel that is sitting to my left as we sing about our worthy Lord. She interweaves her voice like colored threads through tapestry… simply beautiful. ~ Did he just call me AMAZING? I can not believe he employed such eloquent speech to describe me… just listen… wow, my brother is comparing me to the stars and other celestial bodies… he says even the way I’m WIRED is simply AMAZING! ~ Oh, wow… why the tears? I said I wouldn’t do that this year. But this night is all about family and why each one of these people are so important to my journey. Most of them really only know one … or maybe two sides of me, but they don’t even know that I have about as many sides as an OCTAGON! Maybe it’s okay if I am transparent and show them who I really am. But what will they think of my tears? Forget everybody! IT’S MY PARTY! ~ Wow, I have heard my sister recite this poem… ‘Drip, drop…’ I’ve heard it before so many times, but tonight it’s for me. She’s talking about my tears. So precious… just what I needed. ~ I wonder if this was as much of an EXPERIENCE for them as it was for me? Well, see… yeah, he’s calling it an ENCOUNTER. That’s what I mean. I wonder if this time has changed them as much as it has changed me.

I began this email many drafts and several days ago. I wanted to find just the right way to say THANK YOU, but I haven’t found it yet. How do you show appreciation for what you all did for me Friday night? How do I explain the JUMPSTART I feel in my spirit or the EMPOWERMENT I sense for the next phase of my life? How do I talk about the INSPIRATION that was expressed through so many of you? I don’t think I can, so I’ll just settle for…

thank ya!
Thank Ya!!
THANK YA!!!

Pardon the drama, but I must say this....
YOU GUYS TOTALLY RUINED MY BIRTHDAY MONTH!!!

I felt like I was in a comatose state most of Saturday. I thought it was just fatigue and out right exhaustion at first, but as December 7, the day of the Mahogany Daughter, has come and gone, I realize that the pinnacle of my birthday season has been reached and it would be near to impossible to top what you all have given me with your presence and L-O-V-E. I want that evening to be seared in my mind as a life altering, defining moment in time. Just when I thought that 35 could not be outdone, you made 36 unforgettable for me. YOU ALL HAVE MADE MY ENTIRE YEAR SPECIAL!!! YOU ARE AMAZING!!!

I have been officially shamed into dealing with my CREATIVITY (that's what Gene calls the mess on my side of the room) that my wonderful husband allowed you all to see in our bedroom. He insisted on using our bed as a coat check even as the surrounding space sat in its POST-BOOK WRITING ERA. I went through and collected the 20 or so books used for design ideas, several styrofoam cups that held my nightly ice slushies, pieces of paper, sticky notes and THE CLOTHES... (outer and under... OMG! I will leave those unmentionable...) I think that you got to see every outfit I contemplated wearing that night flung some where around the room. My brothers and sisters, I have accepted the fact that if we weren't FAMILY before, WE IZ NOW!

I LOVE YOU ALL!!!

We are planning the book release for a Saturday afternoon in May and would love for the FAMILY to be a part of it. We will keep you posted about the exact date.

Hugs and Kisses…
Honey and Molasses…
Peaches and Cream…
And all the rest!

DONE!!!!

I'M IZ FINISHED!!!!WHOO HOOOO!!!!!!!

This morning, December 3, 2008 at 3:34 AM, I gave birth... again. Hubby was napping in the bed beside me as I pushed through to transition, but when the baby cried for the first time he was right there embracing this new life with me. I don't think I have ever been in labor so long for anything! Oh, the PAINS of BIRTH! And then the afterbirth and the other unspeakable things! I am just glad that that part is over and I can enjoy this new bundle of joy! I don't even mind the new stretch marks!

Of course, we want to make sure the baby is healthy, so we are still having her checked out. Yes, I said HER!!! I finally got my GIRL!!! And she is absolutely GORGEOUS! She looks just like her momma and she even has my complexion. When you see her you will know she is mine, 'cause she sounds and acts just like me, too!

I know I haven't been very sociable lately. Ladies, you know how it can get towards the end. Guys that have lived with a pregnant woman know, too. Thank you for being so patient with me. We wanted to wait to have a shower for her until after she is she's presentable, clothed properly and ready to greet the world. Gene and I will let you know when that is... prolly some time in the Spring.

Now, for those of you who don't have a clue what I am talking about because sleep my deprivation is too intense for you to decode my ramblings...I'M IZ FINISHED WRITING MY BOOK MANUSCRIPT! I'M IZ DUN DESIGNIN' MY COVER! I'M IZ DUN PUTTIN' ALL'A IT IN MY TEXT DESIGN PROGRAM! I DUN ADDED MY GRAPHICS, TRANSFERRED IT TO PDF and DUN MADE ME A BOOK!!!

Technically, I could publish it on line as an ebook now, but she is too special to just be online, so we are planning to have a book release shing ding or something, but right now we are just excited she is here. Plus, we need it to edited a few more times. I have been writing since August, but with one-third of my year consumed with getting this done I am ready for a change!

Gene is going through this book with a fine toothed comb and is on his forth read of this 200 page book... and I thought it would be a 50 page booklet at most. (Can YOU believe that I had so much to say?) Each time he reads it as if it is the first time and each time becomes more passionate about the EXCELLENCE that he expects from this project. He has been my greatest encourager and has continually admonished me to write for the people that are to be our audience; that our message about 'relationships with God, ourselves and others' will benefit.

Thank you for your encouragement and support! I appreciate you!

If ya been prayin' for me, please keep it up! If you haven't, please do... I NEED IT!!!!!

WRITE THE BOOK!!!

A SEASON OF GRACE!
That is what one person (SDC) calls what she is extending towards me. She says it seems like I have been in outer space. I assured her that the spaceship was still in the back yard and I hadn't left... yet! A special SISTA COUSIN (CHL) of mine said that I had that she knew that I was a BIG TIME AUTHOR and all but I could call some time. And then there are those that say, "I called you and you didn't answer the phone!" (ALD, NW, RBP, ANH, SAB,...) I'm not being rude, I just don't have the ringer on, because I know if I do I will never WRITE THIS BOOK!

Let's see who else can I tell on... can't think of anybody else so I will move on.

I THANK YOU FOR BEING SO UNDERSTANDING!!!

Just took a break to send a short message to say THANK YOU FOR BEING YOU and to ask you for:

Your continued prayers for wisdom as I WRITE MY BOOK!
Your continued support as I WRITE MY BOOK!
Your continued understanding if the ringer is off and I miss your call as I WRITE MY BOOK!

Do you see a reoccurring theme here? What have I been focusing on, besides being grateful that I am surrounded by people like you that believe that I CAN DO THIS and allowing that to be fuel and motivation for me? I HAVE BEEN EATING, SLEEPING AND BREATHING MY BOOK! I HAVE BEEN WRITING MY BOOK!!!

For those that know how I can get, YES, I am in project mode right now and so I am a bit OBSESSED with completing this task that I have begun. In many ways it is my gift to myself this year. Gene is very supportive and always encouraging me to WRITE THE BOOK. My guys are, too. They seem to have no doubts about my ability to write the book and, amazingly, they think I'm pretty smart. That feels good. Their only criteria is that IT BETTER BE GOOD.

Your continued encouragement is invaluable to me. Okay... gotta go now and WRITE MY BOOK!!!

HAPPY B'DAY, GENE!

Six Weeks times TWO!

Hey… It’s Drea again! I wanted to let you know how we ended our SIX WEEKS…


CRAZY DAYS…
This past week of storms left us without power for about four days. We were fortunate because our house temperature never rose above the seventies and there was even food that remained frozen in our freezer. HALLE-GLORY! Some candles, a few coolers, some ice, and an impromptu BBQ helped us get through it all with minimal damage. We charged the cell phone and laptop in the car and did whatever other resourceful things we could come up with. It is amazing how dependent we can become on something that, in most instances, is not necessary to maintain life. Water was a much more valued commodity during those few days... gas was next for hot showers. Electricity proved to be more of a luxury and the lack of it more of an inconvenience than necessity.

A week before that, I spent serving as Conference Mom at our Youth Conference with about a thousand teenagers, which I affectionately refer to as ‘The Rough Riders’. I must admit, however, that I have wa-a-ay more fun in the youth services where it is more acceptable to scream, yell, jump and do cartwheels at will, so I had a BLAST!!!

‘TRANSFORMERS… MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE’
All of the transformation that we have been undergoing is paying off and we have been kept busy tying new things in with the NORMAL aspects of our lives. We have been able to achieve minimal goals from making a decision to live a disciplined lifestyle for 6 weeks. We wondered… How different would our lives be if we continued and began to inventory other areas of our lives? We think we could see AMAZING change in a year’s time and over a lifetime….. WOW!

We share our process with you as a form of accountability. It strengthens our resolve and dedication to our process to know that there are people that know what we are aiming to achieve and will expect change to happen. We believe that many of our goals and dreams are not achieved because we do not allow ourselves to be held accountable to follow through with activities and disciplines that we begin. We consider you all a part of our process and an integral part of our success.

The SIX WEEK SEASONS work well for us because Gene and I have been able to find a balance in our personalities. He gets the discipline of routine that he enjoys and I get a goal-oriented project that I know will have a STARTING and STOPPING point. So we have found a way for us to WORK WELL TOGETHER! WHOO HOO!!!

We have decided to enter another six week cycle that we have dedicated to CONSOLIDATING, CLEARING THE AIR and COMPLETING PROJECTS.
This is where we are and how we are building from here:

DREA Education
Completed first set of counseling courses; Dedicating more time to reading for enrichment and understanding

GENE Education
Dedicating time to reading (GOALS by Brian Tracy) and studying (working on Exodus)

GENE Nutrition/Fitness
Cut down on excessive sweets and breads; lost 16 lbs.; committed to running and strength training

DREA Nutrition/Fitness
Cut down on excessive salty, fatty and sweet foods; lost 15 lbs. and about 20 in. all over; committed to walking and Yahweh Yoga to help maintain physical and mental and emotional balance and well-being

House Maintenance
Still bringing it all together; focusing on CONSOLIDATING and CLEARING THE AIR of unused or unnecessary items in our home

Finances
In our 10th week of Financial Peace University and have paid off A LOT of our debt. Following the disciplines and principles, we will be left with only a student loan, our car payment and our mortgage when the course is complete in a few weeks.
YEEEE HAAAA!!!!

Our RELATIONSHIP THANG…
Working on a new audio project; working on some writing projects, including some study materials and a book


OUR NEW BABY!!!
Friday evening, our newest edition was born into the world! Mother and father were surrounded by a doctor who guided us with his wisdom, a midwife who is an experienced mother and familiar with childbirth, a doula who assisted during labor, and an elder who encased it all in prayer. Together they served as a support and a covering as we travailed through labor, transition and eventually gave birth. The baby is so beautiful and is everything that we hoped it would be, with so much potential to grow healthy and strong. Besides that, the resemblance to us is remarkable! You can get a glimpse of the little beauty at the bottom of the email.

HOW ABOUT YOU?!!!
Gene and I love to celebrate with people. We appreciate you allowing us to share our journey with you. Now, we want to hear about what’s going on with YOU! When we hear about the awesome things that God is doing in others, it gives us and extra boost. We know that what God has promised us and what we are believing God for is not only possible, but will happen at the appointed time, as we are faithful to His will for our lives. Your personal victories and testimonies encourage us, so let us hear them!

We love you guys and appreciate all of your continued encouragement. Should God bring us to your hearts or minds, please talk to Him about us and whisper a prayer on our behalf.


Hi-Ho! Hi-Ho! It’s off to work we go!

HAPPY 'BORN/LAUNCH' DAY, HARMONIC CONNECTIONS!!!

I GOT NEXT!

While we were waiting for the lights to come on, our neighbors across the street and surrounding us got their power back. I went over to my next door neighbors’ house and said, “When’s it gonna be our turn?’ Hmmm…

Before I left out of the house one of son’s excitedly said, “Ooh, Mom! The lights are on across the street… that means we’re gonna be next!” Twenty-four hours later we still had no lights.

God talked to me a bit about it all and my response to the situation. He showed how similar it was to our personal vision. Sometimes it seems like everybody around us has lights and is moving forward and are GLOWING, while we sit in the shadows of candlelight. Sometimes it doesn’t seem quite fair, but then I wonder if I would feel the same way if it was me with the lights on while my neighbors sat in the dark. Good question, huh?

I believe that there are always two kind of people around us… Those who we admire and attain to be like; and those who admire us and desire to be like us in some aspect of our lives. Isn’t it true?

Even with our very good friends, there is usually some part of their character or lives that we admire. And more than likely they feel the same way about you, too.

You’re more this…
They’re more that…
She has longer hair…
He has a nicer job…
You live in a neighborhood I would like to live in and if I had a man like yours then my life would be great!

So many comparisons… It is natural to see the differences, after all when the Creator colored us different hues and coiled some of our hair tighter than others and gave us different personalities, some with a bigger ‘funny bone’ than others, I believe that He did it so that we would stand out as a unique creation, different from any other. It just sometimes takes effort to process our thoughts productively in a certain situations.

Truthfully, the most natural response is the one that you will see as you watch preschoolers play. When one gets the cool toy, the other quickly grabs for it and says, “I want it!” Very seldom will you see children share or cheer for other kids unless they are prompted (or forced) to do so. A few seem to come out of he womb with a special grace, still many of them will need to be taught. But when they learn how awesome it is to give a ‘YAY!!!’ they are hooked… that is, until they grow and learn to reserve their cheering for football games and parades.

As adults, we have been socialized not to pout or fold our arms (in public) and stomp around when we don’t get our way. In the privacy of our own thoughts and secret corners, however, many of us are still saying, “They aren’t even as smart as I am…” or “I work much harder than he does, he doesn’t deserve that…” or simply “IT’S MY TURN! THAT’S NOT FAIR!”

Often it takes maturity (or a child-like spirit J) for us to see others with their LIGHTS on and say, “They are really shining over there! If something so awesome could happen for them, then I know God will give me the desires of my heart. We must be next!”

Instead of moping around and using all of my energy to complain, I decided to celebrate with those whose lights were on as if they were on in my home. Then I lit my candles and got back to living and preparing for the time when my LIGHTS would come on.

Who's Got the Power?

I don’t like the feeling of powerlessness…

I am lying on a mattress in my basement that is currently being illuminated by candlelight. As I write this, our youngest is laying beside me rubbing my arm. Our third son is on the other side of him watching the flickering lights. Our second son is reading a comic book by flashlight and our oldest is serenading us on his acoustic guitar. Dad just began a prayer and I am wondering… about being without power.

When the lights first went out, Gene and the boys were not home yet and the little guys were afraid. Isn’t that what happens when we feel powerless? We become fearful. We stumbled around in the dark but eventually, found our way to the candles and lighters.
.
.
.
As I lay there listening to my husband pray, I was reminded how powerful we really are. The Spirit of God was very tangible in that moment of vulnerability and defenselessness. It is dark and we are not able to see past the radius of the dancing candle light, still there was evidence of great strength in the room that affirms that we are not victims, but indeed very powerful.

We can choose our state of mind, to a large degree. We can choose to concern ourselves with thoughts that we have no control over our life or we can acknowledge and be grateful that what we perceived as power was never our Power Source in the first place.

When our environment and surroundings betray us and we can not decipher one face from another or find our way around in the dark, we have a Power Source that is not affected by the frailty of temperamental humanity in an unstable world. He gives us His words to shine a light around our footsteps and to light our way. He helps us get our bearings again we do not remain disoriented and discouraged in the dark.

Delapidated Things

Delapidated: decayed, deteriorated, or fallen into partial ruin especially through neglect or misuse

I have always wondered why a building would begin to fall apart when no one lived in it. It doesn’t make total sense to me. I literally begins to fall apart. But why?

I looked it up but couldn’t find anything that explained this process of decline that comes as a result of neglect. There are all sorts of materials to consider. Bricks will faire better that wood structures, for example. No matter what type of material it is, however, it will need to be maintained and kept up over time.

Relationships are similar… they must be maintained. Maintenance will look different at various stages of life. Often there is an ebb and flow to them as we transition through seasons of our lives. Still, ‘connection’, maintenance, is necessary. Even if that is once a day for a relationship with a family member; once a week for another or even longer for other friendships in your life. It is important to ‘make the connection’!

Life can be so hectic that it can be challenging to find ‘connecting times’. Often in the midst of our personal challenges and storms, there is so much energy being poured into survival that there is little room for these seeming insignificant moments. Maintaining our relationships is crucial, however.

Just as a house changes, ages and settles throughout the year, the same can be said of those that we care about the most. Each of us is always changing, always aging and always settling more into our individuality. While sometimes we may be grateful that we have been fortunate to miss tumultuous portions of people’s lives and catch them on the other side of it all, we should remember that none of us come out of those situations unaffected. We will be different.

Relationship ‘houses’ that are maintained are kept current. The may need to be rearranged to meet ever changing needs and accommodate additions to the family as they change. Situations and misunderstandings can wreck our relationships if they are not dealt with appropriately when they first pop up. During these ‘connecting times’, you are able to oil the door hinges, check for water damage to your roof and cracks in the foundation. You are able to deal with the maintenance that is needed to hold everything together and keep your relationships from falling apart.

One More Thing....

It’s funny…
People always seem to want what they don’t have… never satisfied.
It is one of the plagues of the human condition

I have a wonderful husband, but I would love to have more friends.
Some sistah’s got plenty of friends, but she wants a man.
A bigger house… A nicer car…

But never really satisfied with what we have…
Seldom grateful… we always want more

Bigger mortgage, higher car note
More to keep up and maintain

And, often, one more thing to keep me from doing what I was predestined and purposed to do

The Light Is Still On...

I am not sure how much longer I want to leave people a room in the back of my heart anymore. I'm tired if leaving the light on. You know what I mean? Like MOTEL 6 when they had the commercial that said, "We'll leave the light on for ya!" They wanted you to feel at home.

When you have a room in someone’s heart it’s like your old room that your parents leave the way you left it. They leave your memories on the walls, your trophies on the dressers and your stuff in the closets. Anytime you want to go home, you have the key to get in and you never have to worry about if there’s room for you. It is a bit nostalgic.

When the parent decides that they need more office space and notices that your room is unoccupied 99% of the time, because you rarely come home to visit, changes take place. Your things may be packed in a box or in the garage or they may be sent to you, because room needs to be made for growth and new things.

That is where I am…

It doesn’t mean you can never go home to visit. You are always welcome to visit, but it does mean that instead of hanging out in ‘your room’ you may have to sleep in the guest room or in the den on the couch.

Almost there.... ONE MORE LAP TO GO!

We are rounding out our 5th week in our 6 WEEKS TOWARD CHANGE and it has been quite a journey and there have been challenges and changes that we did not anticipate from the beginning. My 4 year old nephew, Donovan, left to return to Alabama this past weekend after spending 2 ½ months with us. Everyone has had to adjust to the absence of our little SPEEDY and regroup.

NAKED POPCORN!!!
All was going well with our young men’s duties around the house until we decided that they should switch responsibilities and master other chores... so that they could be ‘well rounded’ young men. Well, we forgot that we would have to retrain them in their new positions. It felt like we were back at square one again, even though the LISTS are there and the 'SHEETS DON’T LIE!!!' they are acting as if everything is written in Japanese. It is coming together again, but slowly.

I bribe them with NAKED POPCORN. If I promise it to them, they move much quicker. It is only the air popped popcorn with a little cooking spray and Butter Buds on it, but they act like it is better than the extra buttered and super salted popcorn at the theater. I guess that is a good thing. They are intrigued about the science that goes behind the little kernel of corn transforming into the fluffy piece of popcorn. Actually, the little guys like it best but the older guys can't stand for them to get anything that they don't get, so it works out GREAT! I think they just get a kick out of yelling ‘NAKED POPCORN!’ throughout the house.


GIMME A D! GIMMIE AN I! GIMME AN S!.....
And then there is a time that comes faithfully when I do not care about discipline, exercise, good nutrition and, least of all, a SCHEDULE! During those times, something in me just wants to have an opportunity to go back in time and spend about five minutes with Eve in the garden. Right before she approached that tree and reached out her God-etched hand to touch the fruit, I would GRAB her, SHAKE her (maybe even POP her one good time) and ask her, “EVE, WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS DECISION RIGHT HERE IS DOING TO ME?!! GIRL, LEAVE THAT FRUIT ALONE!!!!!”

I am grateful to report, however, that, although I haven’t always been happy about it, I have followed THE PLAN, and I have been able to see where I have been tripped up so many times before. Much of the reason that I have not completed personal tasks and goals is because I would give myself a way out when I don’t feel like it. I have evidence all around that stands as proof that living life solely motivated by feelings yields undesirable results. It is one thing to be motivated because we are promised tangible gain or reward for our actions... or it is required by an outside source like an employer. It is entirely a different scenario to work toward goals when the only person pushing you is you and the reward is most valuable to you. So I have a new found appreciation and respect for DISCIPLINE. Who’d a thunk it?! (Don’t smile too hard, Babe.)

This DISCIPLINE THANG has allowed me to complete my Counseling Courses! YAY!!! WHOO HOOO!!!!! Go, DREA, Go! Actually, it’s more like GO, JESUS, GO!!! I have been learning a lot from the instructors. God is so faithful. I usually end up crying through most of the classes. I am finding that God is allowing me to be ministered to and healed as I am preparing myself to be used as a 'helper' to others. I am getting more out of the experience than I had expected. God’s timing is impeccable! Everything is happening just when I need it most.

BRINGING SEXY BACK
Gene has been over here trying to ‘BRING SEXY BACK’! He’s worked his 2 liter back to a 6-pack and he is probably trying to get small children to swing from his arms like his Dad used to do him when he was younger. He's even back to showing people how to make ripples on their biceps. (It's a cool trick, you gotta ask him to show it to you.) I think he's just trying to convince me to go buy him a few 'one size too small muscle man shirts' so that he can be my eye candy. He says he’s gonna bring the ‘light-skinned’ brothers back in style! He is GOOFY!

He has been an athlete most of his life and when I met him at Tuskegee he was a hooper. These days, I refuse to rub him down after every evening of him dunking and trying to relive his glory days on the basketball court. So as part of his six week challenge, he has taken up running, something he used to do in high school. He has been doing well. He has made it up to 7 MILES and I am VERY proud of him. He desires to train and run in the Chicago Marathon someday. Now, all I need to do is convince him that he isn’t 21 anymore and he needs to be more careful with my investment.

He is VERY competitive and finds it difficult not to turn any sport or activity into competition. If there are no other players involved, he will compete with himself. The other morning, he gave us both a scare. He had not been listening to his body or giving it the kind of fuel it needed to be most effective as he trained. God is GOOD and he is on the right track now, but I am still ‘telling on him’ (and if you do that to me again, Babe, I’ll do my Drea Thang and tell the WHOLE STORY… you know the LONG, DETAILED, DRAMATIC version!)

THE LOCKER ROOM
We are learning new things about one another as we are working with each other financially. Gene brings his competitiveness to the situation. It keeps him motivated and single minded towards the goal which is to ‘DESTROY’ our debt. I, on the other hand, am perfectly fine with the ‘DESTROYING’ part, but I need to feel some hope along the way… see some colors… celebrate some victories. Of course, no good athlete would celebrate at half time, so we are feeling some tension in ‘the locker room’.

My ideal ‘locker room’ resembles a day spa. I feel the way to become invigorated is to be in an atmosphere where there are inspiring visuals, soothing aromas and peaceful sounds that bring me to a place of serenity, so that I can think clearly about how to approach a task. Any perspiration would come from the sauna that is helping me cleanse as I am focusing on deep breathing.

Gene, however, is more traditional in his approach. The musty ‘locker room’ with its rusty lockers gives him the ‘EYE OF THE TIGER’. He envisions Rocky about to fight the Russian, a seemingly unbeatable foe, and he (literally) tells me, “It’s time to go to the shed!” It’s time to train! It’s time to sweat! He calls me to a group huddle, and gets in my face (figuratively), does his ‘WAR CRY’ and yells something that probably means, “To the victor goes the spoil!”

Neither of us likes the other’s ‘locker room’, so we try to meet in the middle. Gene says it’s like having the players and the cheerleaders in the locker room together. All Gene needs to get inspired is a black marker on a white surface and some X’s and O’s. When I come in the room lighting incense, putting on soft background music or trying to draw hearts and flowers around his markings with colorful markers (to create a canvas that will give the room a better aura), then there is potential for things to get really HOT in our ‘locker room’. We are figuring some things out and making some compromises. We’ll see how it goes.


We are working hard to keep the momentum going so that, when the six weeks are up, we are in a position to be launched further into our purpose and closer to our destiny.

Thank you for your support and for serving as a form of accountability for us.



Drea

No more 'WATER WINGS'!

I have been thinking about you a bit and praying for you, too.

Sometimes when I think about the changes that you are trying to make in your life, I envision you on a beach trying to walk out into deeper water. It isn’t that hard at first when the water is only around your feet. But as it gets higher, you have to make more effort and pick up your feet to make progress.

You may notice that the waves that were once insignificant on the shoreline are encumbering now that they are around your waste. They seem to be carrying you backwards with every step you take forward. Excess clothing fills with air and makes your journey even more challenging. Even after you remove them, you are still battling the water… the waves… and fatigue in your mind and your body.

If you know how to swim there is no problem, because you have become comfortable with the element and water is no longer your enemy. But if you are still learning how to ‘think like a fish’, it can be frustrating. Sometimes we are comfortable with the water because we have ‘water wings’ or a life jacket that keep us afloat. That’s fine for people that want to stay close to the edge of the water and play and splash around and get wet. But if you want to go to deeper water… you have to learn how to swim.

The technique itself will work against everything that you know as a land dweller. The principles of gravity will function differently. You have to learn to rely on your senses in a different way. Breathing is not as effortless as it is on land. You have to be more conscious of your ‘breathing’ and staying connected to your Life Source or you will drown.

Just remember that when you started your journey from shore you were headed somewhere. You were answering God’s call to your life. You were doing something different and going to a new place. Listen to the instructions of your Savior. You are being trained to be one that is able to co-exist on land and in the water. God needs you to be familiar with both so that you can make the impact that HE created you to have in this earth.

Keep strengthening yourself. Listen for His voice. He promised that He wouldn’t leave you alone or defenseless. NO MORE 'WATER WINGS’! Learn how to navigate these waters so they don’t intimidate you anymore. And once you have MASTERED the water (and I believe you will) and completed your assignment, Jesus will teach you how to MASTER the SKIES!



Love you,

Drea

Two weeks in... THE SIX WEEK JOURNEY

"A person with a clear purpose will make progress on even the roughest road.A person with no purpose will make no progress on even the smoothest road." ~ Thomas Carlyle


July 1, 2008


Well…

We have two weeks under our belts on this SIX WEEK JOURNEY TOWARDS CHANGE and the one word that would describe what is happening over here is … “OUCH!” Other phrases being used are: “But WHY… ?” “Not that, too!” “Can’t we deal with that later?” “But…but…but…”

We are pleased with the changes that we are making and the progress we see so far with our schedules, nutrition, education, finances, etc. Our young men are adapting well, although they are discovering loop holes to our plans that require us to tweak our guidelines frequently.

I understand more and more each day that the CHANGE that I desire to see in my life requires that I develop a new way of looking at routine aspects of my life. I have to allow myself to see from another perspective so that my mind is changed and renewed. There are situations that I have passively stumbled into, however, in order to get out of them I will have to make some tough decisions. Dave Ramsey says that there are situations that have to be approached with ‘GAZELLE INTENSITY’ as if being chased by a CHEETAH!!!! I have to want FREEDOM bad enough to fight to get it.

An example of this would be my body weight that I now refer to as my LOVAGE. (Isn’t that HOTT? My brother gave me that!) Well, because my name is Drea and I don’t respond well to negative reinforcement, I decided to change the way that I view and refer to weight on my body, while still being truthful about what it is. The glass is half full, my friend!

F-A-T is ‘stored energy or fuel’ in the body. It is only there because I have chosen to take more food into my body than my body could burn at one time… along with over indulging in STUFF that did very little to maintain or promote wellness in this AWESOME, life-giving, self-healing machine that I call my body, but God calls the temple of the Holy Spirit.

Well, just like the STUFF that is in my garage and closets that I keep ‘just in case I need it’, but have not used in YEARS… If I haven’t used it by now, I ain’t gonna use it and it’s gotta go! All it does is create CLUTTER or, as I like to call it, extra LOVAGE that is not required to do life WELL as DREA!

I am learning a lot of things through our process. Some of these lessons have been personal revelations, while other concepts I gleaned from others. These words and ideals are proving to be a source of strength for me.

I love this quote:
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. ~Marianne Williamson

When the Masons come to your heart…
Just keep prayin’!
Just keep prayin’!
Just keep prayin’, prayin’, prayin’!


Love ya!
Drea

SIX WEEKS TOWARD CHANGE!

June 16, 2008

HELLLLOOOOOO!!!!!!!

I just wanted you to know that for the next 6 weeks my hubby and I will putting our household through a mini BOOTCAMP! My (personal and collective) goals for these 6 weeks are:

· To begin to loose excess weight and develop healthier nutrition habits that will assist me in becoming the best me. I will follow this plan and, hopefully, come away from it with healthier life style and eating habits that I will continue to incorporate into my daily life. Geno has also established goals for himself regarding his health and fitness.

· To complete counselor curriculum that I have had since Mar 07. It is a Christian curriculum in counseling that I started but never finished. I ultimately desire to complete the degree in Biblical Counseling, as well as, continue on to qualify for my Board Certified Biblical Counselor Credential. Including this curriculum, I need to complete three course studies to receive a diploma and four total for the Advanced Diploma Program.

· To bring order to my home by clearly outlining the expectations for each member of the family. This includes a schedule for the kids and detailing cleaning duties and expectations in each room. The goal is to take some of the emotionalism out of our home by typing out standard procedures for cleaning each room, the schedules, meal plans, etc. so there are FEWER SURPRISES... fewer EXCUSES... and ACCOUNTABILITY for everyone. Our motto: THE SHEET DON'T LIE!!!

· To inventory our finances and better steward the resources God has entrusted to us. We are currently enrolled in a 13 week course with Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University, and are being challenged regarding every area of our finances. Our desire is to 'Live like no one else today so one day we will be able to live like no one else.'

There are probably other things that will change as a byproduct of our obedience to God in these areas that we have not thought about. Nevertheless, we are excited about the changes that are coming to our home and we believe that as God is transforming us, inside and out, He will also be positioning us to transition us into the next phase of our lives.

I do want to say this though... this is only for SIX WEEKS! It is a very challenging venture for me for several reasons. You know that I am a FREE SPIRIT and I generally resist being confined, controlled, scheduled, told what to do, restricted, etc. Perhaps you can see my real issue better now. I won't be able to just go with the flow or live in the moment as I am accustomed to doing. But I understand that God desires to bring BALANCE to our entire family so that we are able to be most effective and live out our purpose on this earth.

Please pray for and with me (and us). There have been few times in our marriage that Gene and I have been so united in action for the same purpose. That is one of the reasons that I am sure we will accomplish what we are setting out to do and will not fail as we strive to support one another. We are convinced that God is giving us a window of opportunity to change some things in our lives... to move past old issues... to let some stuff go and deal with some issues so that we can embrace the AWESOME future God has for us.


I LOVE YOU!

Drea

SPIRITUAL SUPERMAN

I am the oldest of three boys and I was born and raised in Chicago. I have fond memories with my family, but have many blank spots about my younger years. Kindergarten thru 3rd grade, all I remember are feelings of just existing. I don’t really remember much during that time about school. I didn’t apply myself to much and did a lot of daydreaming. I did not know how to engage people and anything that was outside of the norm of what I was comfortable with was hard for me to process.

I didn’t feel plugged in to anything that defined me. I took everything that was thrown at me, the good and the bad, but did not know how to filter what I was receiving. I did not have a place of origin. I believe some of my behavioral issues stem from my not knowing how to deal with my mom and dad separating before I started school. I am told that I was kicked out of nursery school for being very hyperactive and despondent. The report was that I should have been placed in a special school for kids with learning disabilities.

My self-esteem and confidence was extremely low. I recall many occasions being picked on and teased by classmates and neighborhood kids. Outside the house, everyone and everything seemed bigger than me and I felt like a speck in the universe. At night I comforted myself by sucking my finger and tweeding my hair in knots. My brother was the only real friend that I could depend on that wouldn’t turn his back on me.

When I was about 9 years old I went to live with my Dad. We stayed busy with a variety of sports and the discipline helped me shape a new attitude on life. Basketball was our focus. The practices were long and hard but being a part of a team was great and I was gaining friends. As time passed my skills and confidence grew. It was refreshing to be good a something for a change.

Although my basketball skills were getting better, I still fought bouts of insecurity. I remember at 14 years old winning Most Valuable Player at a summer basketball tournament in Minnesota. Some of the kids protested the decision. I tried so hard to be accepted that their opinion meant more to me than my own thoughts about myself and I began to wonder if I really deserved the trophy or anything that was good.

In school I always applied myself because in order to play ball I had to maintain my grades. The hard work and sacrifice paid off. After high school, I was accepted into Tuskegee University where I received honors as a student athlete, but I still had issues. I still wanted to be accepted as someone who mattered and not only because of my talents.

The summer of my sophomore year in college I accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior. It happened at a time when the scholarships, the friends and attention were no longer enough to hit that deep need in my heart for acceptance. The accolades I received were only a temporary bandage on a deeper wound of wanting to be accepted. Many of my relationships ended up in hurt and resentment as I attempted to drown out negative feelings by lashing out in defense, partying or by getting really busy. None of my efforts helped.

My real issue was that I was ashamed of myself and could not accept myself. No matter how much I was affirmed. Family and friends were rooting for me to succeed, but I could not get past the competitive comparisons that I made in my mind. I was always comparing myself to the next person and I never measured up. Consequently, people couldn’t latch on to me because I couldn’t latch on to myself. I made it hard for people to see my worth. Jesus claimed me so that I could love myself and no longer be ashamed of who I was.

My decision to be in relationship with Christ was and still is the greatest choice I have ever made in my life. I spent years wanting to be accepted and now I’m accepted and loved unconditionally by the King of kings. No matter where I am on the scale, Jesus accepts me just the way I am. This truth produced wanders in my life and changed my relationships with people. People became drawn to me because I identified more with my natural self and who God made me to be. I had true inner peace.

I graduated with a Bachelors of Architecture Degree and a year later Andrea and I were married. I worked as a property manager and eventually branched out into my own Kitchen and Bathroom Remodeling business with a trusted friend and mentor. By this time, we had two sons and Drea had left teaching in the school system to home school them.

As the newness of my Christian life began to wane, I allowed my spiritual life to dry out. The old feelings of shame slipped back into my life because I began placing people on the throne of my heart in the place of Jesus. I began to slip into my old way of thinking came back, ‘what people thought about me mattered more than what I thought about myself’. With the responsibilities of family added to the equation, I now needed to step up and once and for all completely squash this fear. It was pecking away at my family and my dreams.

Drea and I struggled, but our commitment to Jesus held us together. Through the many challenges, prayers, talk sessions with mentors and trusted friends, we began to learn how to respect and value each other. We continue to invest in each other daily and have discovered how to pull in the same direction instead of continually living with each other in a tug-of-war. This overflow of intimacy has become an integral part of our relationship. Now, we live to share this intimacy with others.

Sometimes, I feel like I relate to Superman in a lot of ways. As a baby, he was shot across the universe because his planet, Krypton, was in danger of exploding. He was seemingly insignificant in the vast space as he floated around in his capsule, but he would serve a great purpose in the world. In many ways, I floated aimlessly for many years, but God always had a purpose for me.

On earth, Superman was raised by humans who loved and nourished him. However, he could only reach his full potential when he reconnected with his original purpose and was able to learn from his father. I can relate to that. For me, the encouragement that I received from loved ones could not take the place of a relationship with my Heavenly Father. Spending time with Him in my own 'Fortress of Solitude' transformed my life. He showed me the full potential of my strengths and made me a 'Spiritual Superman'. Then I could see my true identity and strength.

Krypton’s explosion had transformed most of the planet’s matter from its original form to a radioactive material, ‘kryptonite’, which was deadly to Superman and rendered him powerless. Every believer has their own 'kryptonite'. Mine was the shame that came because I did not know how to cope and process the things that were happening around me. Because I felt the effects of this 'kryptonite' from such a young age, I did not know that my feelings of helplessness and hopelessness were not meant to be apart of my original plan. I became comfortable being less than average. I am fortunate that I know I was designed me to be so much more.

How have I dealt with my own 'kryptonite' of shame and rejection? I remain open and accountable to my Heavenly Father by retreating to my ‘Fortress of Solitude’ daily. I guard my heart from the accusations and offenses that the enemy throws my way. Daily I choose to thank God and celebrate the liberty that I have in Him. Rather than allowing negative experiences from the past to hinder my future, I use my childhood experiences as tools to remind me of God’s overwhelming strength, love and grace in my life.

In STRENGTH… faster than a speeding bullet!

In FAITH… more powerful than a locomotive!

In LOVE… able to leap tall buildings in a single bound!

When we are born again, we become extraordinary… like strange visitors from another world with powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal men... SPIRITUAL SUPERMEN, who have the power to influence men’s hearts and change the course of the future, as we seek God and build ourselves on bended knee.

We fight a never ending battle for Truth and the advancement of God’s Kingdom.


Eugene Mason III

This Is Me... the REAL ME

For many years, I believed that I did not have a testimony. What is there to tell about growing up in a Christian home with loving parents or going to church every Sunday and throughout the week, like I did? I was, generally, an obedient child with no tales of mischievous exploits. I did not drink, smoke, or experiment with drugs and I was a virgin until I married Gene. Compared to others who have endured abuses and overcome seemingly insurmountable obstacles from the past, do I have anything to say? Well, there is always someone who needs to hear your story, so here’s mine.

I am the middle of three girls. I was born and raised in Virginia and lived in the same house all of my childhood. I have dealt with feelings of rejection for most of my life, in one way or another. But then again, who hasn’t. It is one of the enemy's most popular schemes in his battle for man's soul. As a child, I experienced being teased. And if I wasn’t being bothered for always having a larger frame than the other girls, then I was being taunted for being ‘mahogany’ complexioned. While I participated in various activities throughout my youth, I masked many of my insecurities by focusing on my academics and singing, the two areas where I knew I could excel.

By many people’s standards, I was very sheltered, but it wasn’t because I tried to be. There were many instances when I would be with my sisters or friends and miss seeing CRAZY things that everyone else in the group saw. If I showed up to a party where there was a lot of ‘stuff’ going on, there was always somebody that would come up to me and tell me that I shouldn’t be there because the atmosphere wasn’t ME. I believe that, God sent those people to challenge me because He knew more about ME than I knew about ME and my potential for sin.

Attending college did wonders for me. At Tuskegee University, Jesus became more than just my Saviour, as He had been since I was a little girl. While I was there, He became my LORD. I was seventeen and I found myself surrounded by other young people that were unashamedly in love with Jesus. There were no parents around to force us to go to church or pray or study God’s word. We did it because we wanted to grow in our relationship with God. We were young, full of zeal and passionate in our pursuit of God.

I met Gene through the gospel choir. We always seemed to run into each other in the Chapel at noon day prayer or studying the Bible in the Little Chapel before dinner, so we hung out sometimes. We became friends and, after a couple of years (a looong story), we were engaged to be married.

He was working in Chicago and I was finishing up my last year of college as I feverously prepared for my wedding day. We had planned to be married on Mother’s Day, which was also the day I graduated from college.

Three months before the most anticipated, incredible day of my life, my momma died… suddenly. That was definitely not a part of my plans, but I was blessed to be surrounded by family and friends in college that supported me by traveling home with me and assisting me during that time preceding my wedding day. Physically, I was in need of nothing that God did not supply through someone. Emotionally, I was preoccupied with finishing my last semester of college and was having to deal with the fact that I would not have my mom to make my dress and prepare me for my wedding as we had always planned.

Gene and I were married, in the chapel where we met at Tuskegee, on Mother’s Day surrounded by family and friends. The next day after we headed for Chicago. By our first year’s anniversary, we had our first son. I taught high school for a few years, earned a Master's Degree in Secondary Education and then came home to be with our children. We were also very active in ministry. Gene learned to play the keyboard during this time and we were beginning to write music.

We had to work through the same challenges that other couples do. And like many young ladies growing up today who are taught to be independent and strong, it took me a while to grasp the concept of submission, especially when, at the time, I believed that I could do a better job leading the family than Gene could!

In college, we had dreamed of all the wonderful things that we could do together, but those dreams had faded in our minds with the busyness and mundaneness of life. Although most people did not know it, we griped and complained about most things… most of the time. We loved each other and loved being married, but we were not fulfilled in our lives. Like the children of Israel in the wilderness, we went around and around the same mountain for years. We were moving, but not really going anywhere. Eventually, we made a decision to change. We began to seek ways to enhance our spiritual lives, together, as well as, individually. During this time, God began to remind me of how good He had been to me and all the things He hadn’t allowed to be part of my testimony.

He whispered to me one night as I lay in bed: “It didn’t have to be this way…” I did not understand what He was saying to me. He began to bring back memories. He reminded me how when I was eleven He had allowed me to get out of an unsafe situation with an older guy in my neighborhood that had made inappropriate advances toward me. He reminded me how naïve I was as I visited college campuses during the summers and how it was only His mercy that did not allow me to become like the company that I was keeping at the time. He replayed so many of the unwise decisions that I had made as a young adult and presented me with a rhetorical question: “What if things are not what they seem? What if I sheltered you and kept you from so many things because you were really the one that may have never come back to Me if you went out into the world? What if you were really the wildest one of the bunch and I showed my love for you by keeping you away from temptations that you would not have been able to overcome?”

I wept that night as I considered how prideful I had become towards people whose testimonies had been much more colorful than mine. I had considered myself better than them because I had not been ‘tainted’ by the world. But truthfully, once we are born into human bodies we are already tainted, smeared and smudged. I was humbled as God showed me that He had saved me from ME.

Over the years God continued to deal with me about things in my life that I really did not want to deal with, like being a people-pleaser. He showed me how I had placed people on the throne of my heart and desired to please them more than Him. I believed if I served a purpose in their lives then they would want to keep me. I was wrong. He showed how I fought the fear of being rejected by trying to become indispensable to people and overcompensating to conceal who I really was.

As God lovingly maneuvered me through these emotionally tumultuous places, he showed me a common thread of many of my insecurities – I had a strong desire for relationships and family. I had not understood how my mother’s death earlier in my life and distance from my family could affect me many years later. Only in recent years have I actually grieved my mother not being here. No one told me that, in my thirties, I could still long for my mother and, as a grown woman with my own children cuddled in my arms, I could still want to be held by her. I did not understand the importance of maintaining relationships, not knowing that my husband could never be ‘everything I ever needed’.

I had learned to be as self-sufficient as possible and always have 'the answers', which was often interpreted by others as being a know-it-all... which often isolated me. I also learned how to fake it and pretend I didn’t need anyone, but I wasn’t very good at it. And time usually unveiled my true insecurities. Then when people got close to me they were able to see the REAL ME…

But… GOD IS GOOD and works with us perpetually to restore us and help us see ourselves the way He sees us. Looking back, I can see how God had set me apart, at an early age, for His purpose. I see the REAL ME in a different way now...

The REAL ME was hand-crafted by God to serve a specific purpose in His kingdom and meet a need that no one else can fulfill like I can.

The REAL ME embraces my unique peculiarities because I know that I am fearfully and wonderfully made; and that each of my personal attributes was designed by the Creator.

The REAL ME desires the love of others and wants to love people, as well. It is not weakness. It is a characteristic I share with my Heavenly Father.

The REAL ME is not ashamed to experience and enjoy God with abandon. Who the Son sets free is free indeed and where the Spirit of the Lord is there is liberty!

The REAL ME is not afraid of ME anymore.

I once believed that I did not have a testimony. I understand life a little better now. I am certain that the enemy has not given any of us a free pass on our journey. We all have a story to tell and we all have an audience that needs to hear it.

This is how we overcome.


Andrea Little Mason